Marriage is a happy development in anyone’s life. It is also one of the most important developments. What were your thoughts at the time of your marriage? Life is going to be wonderful henceforth. We both found another person to share our lives. Hereafter, our love will keep growing. These are the usual thoughts of a couple at the time of marriage. But if for some reason, the marriage turns sour, each of the two starts thinking of divorce! Divorce is not the end of your problems. In fact, it can be the beginning of another set of problems. So the question ‘Can you stop your divorce and save your marriage?’ is very crucial. On your answer to this question will your future depend.
If you are the one who has been thinking in terms of divorce, the problem becomes simple. Just perish the thought. Give your marriage some time. If you want a divorce, you can get it any time. But if you go for it in a hurry, regretting in future will not help. But if your partner wants a divorce, then you have a problem on hand. You need to convince your partner to change their minds. This may not be easy. But it can be done. Anyway, it has to be done.
Why your spouse came to this decision is not important. Whatever is the background, you can work on your spouse to change their decisions. But your spouse may not be willing to listen to reason. They may not be willing to listen to you at all. Therefore, you need to first prepare the ground for starting a dialogue. You have to start with you.
The first step is to accept the fact that they want a divorce. Accepting a factual situation will, surprisingly, give you the strength and wisdom to face it. This is to do with the way the human mind works. As long as you are denying a reality, your mind cannot think of any solution to the problem. When you deny the existence of a problem, what is the need for a solution? Accepting the reality will restore a sense of aplomb in you and this sense will generate the strength in you to deal with the problem.
Talk to your spouse calmly and politely. Let them know that you respect their decision though it is painful to you. Also tell them that you appreciate their reasons. Do not question them or argue about them. Express your regret for any wrongs you might have committed. After this initial communication, your spouse will be softened enough to listen to you. Tell them that you would like to save the marriage and suggest that you discuss the problems or take the help of a counselor. Though initially your spouse will sound adamant, they will climb down after a while and will be ready to discuss the issues. With some give and take, you can stop your divorce and save your marriage. .