Is there someone special you’ve got your eye on? Then stop screwing around and get to asking her out. If you’ve already built attraction, then you don’t need the perfect line or approach. You just need to avoid these common mistakes that men make when asking girls out.
I don’t care what you’ve heard or read–women like men to ACT LIKE men. You can romance and seduce without being a suck up. And you can certainly be thoughtful without bending to her every whim.
If you haven’t called a woman out on her bullshit at least once in the courting process, you’re probably doing something wrong.
I’m not saying that you should be controntational and aggressive with women. They definitely don’t like that. What they do like is a quiet, firm resolve. No woman will ever respect any man who isn’t willing to occassionally put his foot down on her crap.
Women test. Women push boundaries. It’s what they do. If you’re not signalling early on that certain things don’t fly with you, then you’re going to get tagged as a submissive weenie … and likely she’ll say no to you when you ask her out on a date.
Submissiveness and being overeager often walk hand in hand. Both stem from a lack of confidence.
When you start flirting with a woman, your FIRST goal should be to make sure she understands that you’re attracted to her. Your second goal should be to make sure she knows that you’re not so crazy about her as to be losing sleep over it.
A good rule of thumb is to never ask her for anything twice. Let’s say you ask a woman you’re into if she wants to meet up later at a bar. If she opts out for whatever reason, then you don’t ask again. Otherwise, you look like you’re begging and wheedling for that date. Instead just drop it and don’t mention it again.
3) Being vague
If you’re going to ask a girl out, then you must make sure she understands that it’s a date. This is crucial. In fact, it’s so important that I always counsel guys to SAY the word DATE when they ask her out so that there’s no confusion.
Why does this matter so much?
Because without communicating this intention, you enourage women who are too “nice” to say no to go out with you ANYWAY and pretend it’s just a friendly night out (that you happen to be paying for).
This stuff happens ALL THE TIME because guys want to hedge their bets and not take a direct ego hit by being told no. So what they do is play all these cutsie games that hide their intentions, hoping to reveal that “ta-daaaa! It really IS a date!” after the girl they like agrees to go out with them.
One of the most common ways guys to this is to ask a girl to “hang out” with a group of friends. This just muddies the waters and increases the likelihood that you’ll get strung along, stuck in the friend zone and unable to get out.
Listen, I know that facing possible rejection is hard, but you NEED to be direct with women. They must know from the very beginning that you’re looking for more than friendship. Let them make their decision based on the truth and you’ll fare much better in the long run.