Marriage as a relationship

Posted in Marriage.

Living in a marriage is an art, a skill and a commitment. It is essential to learn the basics of relationship and creating a vibrant life based on that relationship. This would definitely ensure a satisfied and blissful marriage. Marriage is a big responsibility as it makes a man learn more about life and its philosophy. From a woman’s point of view, a marriage and having children make her whole and complete. By not marrying, individuals miss out on the wonderful feeling of existence and essence of being. To enjoy a complete bliss in a marriage it takes a million tiny moves from two people who are from different worlds.

There isn’t a way to learn about marriage other than from experience. These methods about marriage are not taught in a school or university. People just follow the path laid down by their predecessors. This implies a lack of effort in trying to learn the fundamentals of marriage and relationships. In an ideal world a marriage should work just fine but it doesn’t. Some marriages breakdown or there is some tension in a relationship. The partners in a marriage become victims of stress and strain.   In such an emotionally charged mindset, many of them fail to analyze, investigate, and realize the quintessence of life and their role in a married relationship.

For a smooth running of a relationship, it is important to offer compromises to your partner than just feeling good about being in a relationship. One should pause to ask oneself does being married only means getting comfortable with security of having food and clothing, and shopping? Marriage is hard enough bringing such low expectations into it. Being in a relationship, instead, means doing things what other partner wants, doing in the way partner wants, gives immense pleasure to the partner. This  ‘relationship action’ gives satisfaction of being in a relationship. People everywhere have lost the pleasure of performing these ‘relationship actions’. They try to find peace and happiness by abstaining from ‘relationship actions’. Hence everyone looks forward to the weekend and vacation. This is new generation weakness. If you cannot find peace and happiness in ‘relationship actions’ you can never find it through abstaining from them. At least one ‘relationship action’ in a week keeps the relationship going stronger and deeper—which can be measured by a cheerful and broad smile on the beloved’s face.  

Most people today seek wealth and enjoyment from marriage. This is kind of top line in modern marriages at least to initiate the marriage proposal and later they match compatibility and personality to find the right person. Although it is well accepted, and many a time people do get the lifestyle desired; for a relationship to endure, the key factor is to accept one another and share each other’s experience in a married life.

In regard to it, a relationship can be explained in Sanskrit as “Anubhava dhara”, as in a stream of experiences. As long as experiences flow, there is a life for both as a couple. When the flow ceases relationship becomes extinct. An experience is therefore a unit of life. This life experience comprises of two factors: Subject and Object. When you communicate with the world, subject meets object, you gain experience. Together or individually the flow of experiences is life. At the end of the day an ideal spouse would be one who is able to spellbind you to share or listen to the experiences either for the interest on you (subject), the story (object) or both. If not or if there isn’t any common experience between two; relationship is going to go down. Thus, sharing of experiences and opinions between two are important in a sustained healthy relationship.

Let us look at a few ways available to take this relationship to a higher plane. How you as a couple are related to the world to find peace and harmony? It is not the world or other people who bother you as you believe it to be—but the relationship you have with them. It is practically impossible to have selfless service in marriage. However, it is essential to mend the quality of emotion from preferential attachment to love. Raise self-awareness of reliance of a soulmate in every aspect from mundane to the extraordinary experience to one’s senses. This will reach the culmination of life and relationship, the ultimate state of peace and bliss, the goal of marriage. 

Spiritual connection is very essential in every relationship which is the superset of physical attraction. This binds two souls made for each other. There is chemistry in whatever they attempt to do together. Mind carries soul-mate images to boost up motivation and deal with real life in day-to-day activities. This state in mind results in blissful conditioned-cons

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