Why we need a pre marital verification

Posted in Marriage.

Pre- Marital Verification:

There are several areas where info has been provided but needs to be verified. You could be in for serious trouble if you go by the unverified information. In cases where marriage is contemplated, some info is verified while some other needs to be collected. Pre marital verification is perhaps the most important one as it could make or mar the whole of your life.

            Marriages are made in heaven but consummated on earth. Long as they live, parents continue to worry about their children. They take care of them to the best of their ability. Parental care in India, commencing at birth, includes health, education, career guidance, financial help, marriage, advice and assistance in almost everything. Despite the weakening of family ties, most marriages in India are still arranged by the respective families. Finding grooms and brides, suitable ones, is the most onerous responsibility discharged by parents. An error of judgment here and your life is likely to come off at the seams.

            As marriage is considered to be a life long relationship, precautions must be taken. Enquiries are made to gather as much info as possible about the prospective bride or groom. Relatives are pressed into service, neighbors are discreetly questioned about the family’s financial standing, habits, physical fitness, character, and past record etc. Investigation agencies could come into play in gathering such information. Astrologers are also consulted. Horoscopes are matched. This practice is now not as common as it used to be, but is still followed by a large number of Hindus. Astral protection, nevertheless, is no guarantee of a successful marriage. Demands of human nature are much more powerful than all the planetary influences put together.

            Whereas marriages are rarely arranged in the west, Indian culture continues to prefer them by and large. A marriage could be a love-marriage, arranged marriage or forced marriage. Whatever the nature of the marriage, its success depends upon the nature of the individuals involved. To gather information about that very nature is the real purpose of a pre-marital verification. It’s not an easy job. But then, marriage is not an easy relationship. Mundane facts, even when most desirable, don’t lead to a successful matrimonial alliance. World is full of divorcees whose horoscopes matched or who married out of love. Investigation agencies can definitely help to reduce the number of divorce cases pending in courts.

            Divorce is not considered a stigma in the West. In India, however, it’s a social as well as financial draw back. Most of our girls become merely housewives after marriage. They remain unemployed and have no money of their own. If divorced, they will have nothing to fall back on. So they continue to compromise. Divorce cases take years to be settled and in a corruption-ridden society, conclusions are foregone. Who would marry a poor widow, particularly one with encumbrances? So, once a woman becomes a divorcee, her family life is finished, her financial resources are gone and she is a burden for every body, including her own miserable self. To avoid such an eventuality, it is imperative to have an exhaustive pre-marital verification and gathering of necessary information.

            You may be able to avoid some of the repercussions of divorce if you are educated and employed. But shock, tension and disgust will persist for years to come and even after a second marriage, the girl may not be able to enjoy a normal family life. As they say, prevention is always better than cure. Pre- marital verification is an attempt to prevent break up of marriages, at least a substantial number of them, by trying to assess the suitability of an alliance.

            An unsuitable alliance and a broken marriage could equally adversely affect the life of a boy too. Only boys are in a better position to take care of themselves. They can contract a second marriage with comparative ease and in case they are rich, they can bribe their way through a court case without too many problems. An investigation agency is not meant to fight the corruption in the system but it can certainly help you avoid facing that corruption.

            The complexities of modern life make it almost impossible for a family to go beyond the superficial. Individual as well as families have several faces and a few well-hidden skeletons in their cupboards. There are masks under masks and only the persistence and expertise of an investigation agency can unmask the truth. Most people are deceived by outward appearances and are not able to break the shell that hides the kernel. As a result,

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